I Refuse To Be Perfect

Photo Credits: Darious Smith

Photo Credits: Darious Smith

Photo Credits: Darious Smith

Photo Credits: Darious Smith

Photo Credits: Darious Smith

Photo Credits: Darious Smith

It’s normal to strive for perfection, to want to be the best. Human nature can be blamed for making us want to hide our flaws, or just lose them all together. We’ve all made mistakes, and will continue to make them, but what would happen if we didn’t make mistakes? How would we be different people? For me, I do not believe that I would be myself without the mistakes I’ve made, and I would dare to say the same is true for everyone. Learning from mistakes, and the consequences thereafter are important continuous steps in life, and are critical to our growth. Therefore, I am stronger now than I was a few years ago, or even a few months ago, due to learning as I’m living. I am a smorgasbord of faults that have made me, me.

 

I had a realization recently that helped me accept these truths. An epiphany that is changing my outlook on life completely. See, I realized how lucky I was to have the parents and grandparents I have. Yes, they’re awesome, and yes I already knew this, but they’ve been doing something my whole life that has completely benefited me that I never understood the purpose of until now. Something that I’m sure was not easy for them, but they knew it was necessary. They always told me about their mistakes, their mishaps, moments in their lives where they knew they were on a bad path. Regardless of these, my grandma makes a mean banana pudding and my grandpa is an amazing musician with a huge heart. They wouldn’t be the people they are today without their previous shortcomings. Growing up I never would have imagined that my parents had moments in their life they wish they could erase, but they do, and from telling me about those times I knew from a very young age that making mistakes were a vital and important part in life. However, I was also always told that the goal is to learn from those mistakes and to always apologize to anyone you may hurt.

 

I’m sure that wasn’t easy for my parents and grandparents to be so open at times. I’m not a parent myself, but I would imagine that you want your kids to think the best of you, and that it would be scary to let them know that you have flaws just like everyone else. Actually, we all do that in life if you think about it. I know that I do. The reason why I believe my parents and grandparents were so open with us was to save us from the dense consequences of the bad moments they faced in life. It also created an environment of openness that was inviting and welcoming for us to open up about our faux pas.


With these revelations in hand, I have recently started trying to apply that mindset in life. While I do believe it is important to present your best self, I am learning that I cannot help others who are going through hard times if I subconsciously stay seated on my high horse and refuse to come down. One of my biggest passions in life is being there for the people I love, and helping them through life. From my experience, I am unable to offer advice without opening my heart and my mind to their circumstances. Whether I am in a deep conversation with someone who has been hit with life’s inevitable problems, or just in a normal engagement, I prefer to present my real self, not the face that I put on for small talk. Now, this isn’t an effortless thing to do, but I’m trying to make it a habit. So thank you to my parents and my grandparents, and all of the others who have always shown me that perfection is not the end goal of life. My end goal is to go through life showing love to others, and learning a whole bunch along the way.